Saturday, September 17, 2005

Superman

Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do
And nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

-- Lifehouse - You and Me

I can already predict that this is going to be the most absurd of any piece ever written by the likes of me *grins*, I can feel it in my bones... but oh well... here goes....

I am broken. I am at a stage in my ever-evolving distress-scenarios of life where I need a rescuer... someone who will whizz me away on a jet plane far far away from the cruel remarks and bitter remorse of the world... someone who will save me... who will pick up all the scattered pieces of me... some of which will be impossible to retrieve... someone who will love me for every piece he picks up and embellishes with his own name. Someone who will fill up those missing pieces himself instead of trying to find them amongst the shattered ones that lay on the ground beneath where I once was.

I was once alive. I had a life, dreams, faith, hope... and above all, a personality. Now.. I just don't. Maybe the change in my style of writing can reflect all that I'm saying. Maybe it could more simply be explained by describing the key very-moving personalities in my life...

I know a boy with the eyes of an angel.. a soul that was embraced by one... and a voice no less than that which belongs only in dreams. If it were possible in any way to hear, see or touch a dream, it would sound, look and feel like him and him alone. A boy who knows everything... knows me... touches me to the depths further than others can even hope to see.

I know a boy with love that could shatter mountains, if only a feeling could move earthly objects. A boy who looks at me and sees someone he wants to spend the rest of his life with... a boy who would easily die for me and never look at me remorsefully if he chanced to run into me in another life. A boy who's eyes I can see myself and only myself in... a boy who even I can have faith in, who even I can believe the love of.... whereas I am the biggest disbeliever in any such phenomenon.

I know a boy with the dream of a home, a good job and of a wife like me. A boy who would steadily, surely and happily make his way through life knowing that I was by his side. I know this boy who dreams of marrying me, and making my life heaven if he could. A boy who believes I am the last girl that will ever be (or not be) in his life.

I know a girl who knows me better then any boy, or any girl, or any parent, or any sibling could ever know me. A girl who knows when I'm faking a smile, or pondering the actions of an unknown person infront of me, or wanting to say no but still saying yes, or wanting to say yes and still saying no. A girl who wants nothing more than to marry me off to someone..... anyone... that she knows and can trust with me. A girl who will never be able to see me give my life to someone that she doesn't think deserves me and can keep me happier than just happy.

So here I am... looking for my superman.... but I can't find him.
My dream doesn't want me
My eternal lover is my best friend
My faithful admirer does not understand me...
And my beautiful well-wisher is so incredibly far away, that I can't even call her half the time I need her to rescue me.

*sigh*.... So much for that.
I told you this would be absurd..

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

i loved every part of what u wrote...u have a gift....that enables u to portray ur thoughts and feelings in such an undescribably beautiful manner keh bass...i hope that one day im half the writer that u are...about this article...u know wat reeju...like i always say...u dont need a rescuer...or a hero...ur one of those ppl who make ordinary ppl like me...feel like superman...and make me beleive that i can do stuff...unimaginable stuff...im glad ur a part o my life...take care babes
(:

*~ Zill • e • Illahi ~* said...

blatant honesty..
hmmmm...

Reej Q said...

blatantly honest..... that is me. i'm sorry if this piece didn't touch u, or make u think, or amuse u, or induce any feelings of any sort at all. i think all my pieces aim to do that... but this one, was just a soul-wrenching situation i had to write in words..

*~ Zill • e • Illahi ~* said...

its okay man..
u can do whatever u feel like..
get ur wildest fanatsies in black & white..and i wud still read through...

Reej Q said...

why thank u...

kN. said...

Ok... first thanx for sparing time for my Blog girl... Areej that is... saw u in Shani's and Rooji's friends list on orkut...
Trust me... u have hell better guts with words than I do... mutlub seriously.... This is SUPERB stuff lady... :)

*hugs back*